How to Write a Eulogy: Step-by-Step Guide

Writing a eulogy can feel overwhelming, especially during a difficult time. This comprehensive guide will walk you through the process step by step, with examples and tips to help you create a meaningful tribute to your loved one.

Step 1: Gather Information and Memories

Before you begin writing, take time to gather information and memories:

  • Personal memories: Write down specific moments and stories you shared
  • Family stories: Collect stories from other family members
  • Their qualities: List their personality traits, values, and characteristics
  • Their achievements: Note their accomplishments, career, hobbies, and interests
  • Their relationships: Think about their role as parent, spouse, friend, etc.
  • Favorite quotes or sayings: Include any meaningful phrases they used

Step 2: Write the Opening

The opening should introduce yourself and set the tone. See our guide on eulogy opening lines examples for more ideas.

Example Opening:

"Good morning. For those of you who don't know me, I'm [Your Name], and I'm honored to stand here today as [Name]'s [relationship] to share some thoughts about the incredible person we're here to celebrate."

Key Elements:

  • Greet the audience
  • Introduce yourself and your relationship
  • Set a respectful, warm tone
  • Thank people for being there

Step 3: Write the Body

The body is the heart of your eulogy. Include:

Their Character and Qualities:

"[Name] was known for [his/her] [kindness/sense of humor/wisdom]. [He/She] had a way of [specific quality or action] that touched everyone [he/she] met."

Specific Memories and Stories:

"I'll never forget [specific memory or story]. That moment showed me who [Name] really was—[describe their character or impact]."

Their Role in Your Life:

"[Name] was my [mentor/friend/confidant], always there to [specific support or action]. [He/She] taught me [specific lesson or value]."

Their Impact on Others:

"[Name]'s greatest joy was [his/her] family/friends/community]. [He/She] made every moment special and touched the lives of everyone [he/she] met."

Step 4: Write the Closing

The closing should provide comfort and closure. See our guide on eulogy closing lines examples for more ideas.

Example Closing:

"As we say goodbye today, I know that [Name]'s love, [his/her] spirit, and [his/her] memory will live on in all of us. [He/She] may be gone from this world, but [he/she]'ll never be gone from our hearts. Thank you, [Name], for everything. We love you, and we'll miss you always."

Key Elements:

  • Provide comfort and hope
  • Emphasize their lasting impact
  • Express love and gratitude
  • End on a meaningful note

Complete Eulogy Example

Opening:

Good morning. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Sarah, and I'm honored to stand here today as Mary's daughter to share some thoughts about the incredible woman we're here to celebrate.

Body:

My mother was the heart of our family. She had a way of making everyone feel loved and valued. Her warm smile, her kindness, and her endless capacity for love were just a few of the qualities that made her so special.

I'll never forget the time she stayed up all night helping me with a school project. That moment, like so many others, showed me who my mother really was—patient, supportive, and always there when I needed her.

Mom's greatest joy was her family. She loved being a mother and grandmother, and she made every moment special. Her home was always filled with love, laughter, and the smell of fresh-baked cookies.

Closing:

As we say goodbye today, I know that Mom's love, her wisdom, and her spirit will live on in all of us. She may be gone from this world, but she'll never be gone from our hearts. Thank you, Mom, for everything. We love you, and we'll miss you always.

Tips for Writing a Eulogy

  • Keep it personal: Use specific memories and stories rather than generic phrases
  • Practice reading it: Read it aloud several times to ensure it flows well
  • Time yourself: Aim for 3-5 minutes (about 500-750 words)
  • Be authentic: Write from the heart and use your own voice
  • Keep it appropriate: Focus on positive memories and avoid controversial topics
  • Have a backup: Print a copy or have it on your phone in case you need it